Man, you suck at this game.

Remember when you only had 75 points and then you let your temple get exploded? That was lame.

Man, you suck at this game. Like, I’ve been over here for thirty minutes already and in that time you have lost 28 cities, nine temples, and broken two joysticks. What are you? Retarded?  I mean, you’re supposed to shoot the missiles. Get that? Yeah, I know you say you get it, but I don’t see you doing it, man!  Do I need to show you how to protect the cities? They’re your cities, man! Come on! Get with the program. Oh, shit! You did it again!

This is what you look like, but stupider and more retarded

You just missed that one. Oh! Oh! Look out! Go right!  Aww. Well, f u c k …. There goes your fucking temple. Don’t have to worry about that one anymore, I guess.  Good fucking job.

It almost makes me want to puke to watch this. Puking might not even be so bad right now, man. In fact, I guarantee it would be better than watching you fuck up this game so bad.

What? You want me to show you how to kick ass at this game? Nice try, loser! One: I’m not going to show you my tricks, and Two: I don’t have to prove anything to you. True masters just know how to do their shit and be badass at it and don’t have to show anyone if they don’t want to. I’m talking true masters, you know, and I consider myself in that league. Yeah. I do. But you? You suck at this game.

My dad is the ambassador of Missile Command. Yours is the ambassador of my anus.