A Musical Guide to Douchebag Avoidance

Two ladies explain how to know when it’s time to leave a party–in song!

Recent Graffiti

Some of my favorite graffiti that I’ve seen recently:

dumpster rebel

Poop! That is all.

The lemon tree told me to, so...

The word butthole is always funny to me.

awwwwwww

Cougar Mellencamp mucho mucho titty grab

Metal Asshole DUDE Broz. rule!

A poem by me, Dennis Calmonte

Hello, my name is Dennis and I am a sophomore at McColley High School and I draw pictures of shoes as a hobby and collect packets of various condiments from fast food places as a second hobby, and I like anime a lot too, but not too much like an obsession like some people say (Harley).  I am a bagboy and work at Randalls and here is a poem I wrote about a lady whose groceries I bagged today who was pretty and smelled good and I was too shy to tell her that I loved her.

Lady with fruits

I want to squeeze all the fruits you just bought like I want to

squeeze your own woman fruits that are on your chest and are big.

Lady, I do not know your name but you smell like a beauty factory that

makes flowers and tits.

Yes, I will carry all your purchases to your car for you and then once

I have put them in your trunk I would like to put something else into your trunk, but not another bag of groceries, hint hint…

When you wrote a check for you groceries I saw that you had Bugs Bunny on them and I thought that was funny because I have seen him on my sister’s shirt except on that shirt he is a hip-hop Bugs, but on your check he was just regular and I like your ass.

Lady with fruits I love you and hope you will come back, cause then I will tell you how I feel when I see you and you will love me and rub my balls, maybe.

–Dennis Calmonte

More recent photos

BATMOBILE!!!!

Holy shit, it’s the Batmobile!

Here it is from behind, which led me to see…

Spiderman infiltrates!

Guard Cat reporting for duty

This guard was totally lazy. All he did was wander about, look cute, and roll around on the ground. Lazy.

Where Miller Lite goes to die.

True Story: When I got out of the car to take this photo, someone I couldn’t see yelled, “I LIKE WHITE GIRLS!!!!”
Let me tell you, Bastrop is a rough place, my friends.

Some More Recent Photos

Keepin it cool at Sharon Baptist Church

Still? Really?

A 12-year old boy lives inside my brain.

Life lessons are important